Journal Entry #18

As I listen to Pandora radio, the string version of Canon In D began to play. Though the instrumental piece is usually soothing to listen to, I find myself hearing of an obliterated relationship; there’s no chance of reconciliation. I’m sad and I have been for a week. I’m very unhappy with God because He took away someone precious to me. I’m in a place that’s difficult to explain. I want to cry but I’m being stubborn; I refuse to. I can’t wrap my mind around the why. Maybe it’s my fault that this person has been separated from me? I’m not sure what the point is. I could understand if I’ve outgrown this individual, but it’s not the case. Maybe in time, things will become more clear to me but for now I’m confused. I haven’t worked out in a week. I’m truly messed up emotionally. What I don’t need is scriptures thrown at me, so don’t. I’ll try to get myself going again, and shake myself out of this slump. It sucks being this way. At least I have classes to help put my mind in another place.

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