Race is a touchy subject in my family. Why? Most likely because of the history between blacks and whites. People my age don’t worry (too much) about if they should date outside their “race”. We have more options these days and I think people should take advantage of that. My mother says that she gave birth two five black babies (girls) and she has no clue how we all turned out to like white men. I don’t just like white men, various branches of Asians are in the group, even Latino’s. I’m not very picky when it comes to race. My mother has said on many occasions that she could see me with a white man and that most of my friends will be white. Who knows, she might be right. I don’t cater to any particular group, I just like what I like. I also feel that I shouldn’t have to date/marry a black man because he is black. For me, I think dating inside my race is boring and safe. There’s nothing wrong with being safe, however, it’s just not what I’m looking for.
We’ve had discussions about what the white race has done to blacks, but I choose not to hang history over white people’s head. On the other hand, I’m not ignorant to history either. I believe in treating people on an individual basis. It’s only fair, right? I’m also aware that I’m not the “typical black woman”. I enjoy listening to Beethoven, Korean music, Japanese music. My choice of entertainment is Korean movies and dramas. I even watch Anime. I plan to travel to South Korea, Japan, China, and Germany, and I’m teaching myself Korean and Japanese. This past Friday (May 9th) I attended an event at my college; I am to become a Peer Leader for students who are new to college life and the campus. I’m there to help and make the transition from high school to college easier for freshmen.
So this event was to gather new and returning peer leaders into the fold and get to know each other. We were given this piece of paper that had a myriad of boxes that read something like this: have you ever seen the ocean, have you been on tv, find someone with you major…. The hour that I was there mingling went fine until I got my wings clipped. I walked up to this guy who was standing by himself (which should have been a big sign for me to avoid him) and said I would initial his paper. So I did that, he looked at mine and asked what my major was and I said English, well that wasn’t a match for my paper. I said that I couldn’t find anyone with my major and this individual said, “the reason you can’t find someone with your major is because generally when people graduate from college, they want to find a job in their field. Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk!”
Now anyone who knows me can imagine the expression on my face. He sho nuff got the side eye. First of all, you never imply that someone’s degree is worthless, let alone tell it to his or her face! His plan is to become a vet. I could have been a Debby Downer, and said that there aren’t many vet hospitals in the US, let alone in Missouri. But did I? Absolutely not! The point I’m making is that I get clipped every single time for the choices that I’ve made. Just a few months ago this young man who (who I’d met once through my sister from school) I’d struck up a conversation with got to talking and I asked him if he was majoring in Art since he had this board covered up. He said yes, and I said that was cool. We resumed talking and then he asked me what I was majoring in. I said English, and I’m minoring in Foreign Language. He said “Oh, great. What language are you trying to learn?” I said, “Korean.” This individual told me to my face that Korean wouldn’t be beneficial to me! Can you believe that?
I think we should think before we stick our foot in our mouth. No one knows where life is going to take you, so they shouldn’t say anything that would hinder a person. I didn’t get discouraged over it, but I did shutdown. It’s a shame that you can’t tell someone your dreams, desires, and aspirations without getting your wings clipped! But I’ll tell you what, I’ve filed every negative comment that people have uttered and am using it as fuel. They have a rude awakening coming. I will accomplish my goals!
Another thing, folks. Remember that you can’t always share your dreams; basically your heart with everyone, because they won’t understand. They won’t understand you, or where you’re headed in life. Only talk to people who you know you can trust, and if you have no one to trust, keep it to yourself and work diligently. You’ll get to where you’re supposed to be. If you want to date outside your race, learn something that isn’t in your culture, or anything else out of the norm, go right ahead and do that as long as it’s not to your detriment.
If people are persecuting you for being different, you must be on the right track. If you don’t fit into the norm in society you going in the right direction. People can’t stand those who stick out. I just wanted to encourage someone today because I know we all have gone or are going through some type of persecution. Just keep walking, stick to your beliefs and dreams and you’ll get there. It’s going to be a hard, and long process, but you’ll get there.